The want for “normalcy” pounds from inside my chest. I give you my best. Once again I am offered less. If I give my all, how can you let me down like the rest. I have felt like a Queen with you. I replay all the memories, not just a few. What am I supposedContinue reading “Some Pain you Cannot Numb”
Tag Archives: recovery
There’s this side to me that I rarely enjoy to let out. Despair tosses inside my stomach when I try to just be. It buries it’s self in my throat. Static ravages my chest. The build up keeps me distracted from any solution. Where do I find relief? A protest for peace is coming. MayContinue reading “Fingers Linger.”
It Ought to be Different this Time…
This occasion is rare. It is not often that we whole -heartedly, disagree. As we end the night, there isn’t a breath to spare. The odd part is I believe in your ideas of how things should be. I get that the reality of it all is crooked. That doesn’t mean I agree with theContinue reading “It Ought to be Different this Time…”
I’ve spent 27 years trying to gain your approval. I’m more successful than I ever dreamt of! My life’s happiness is imperative on your removal. All I ever wanted was your love… Here we go again… Your silence thickness as my relief exudes. If only mom were here…Amen! Manipulation fuels your attitude. You will neverContinue reading “Daddy Issues”
A Captured Soul
Anxiety makes it awkward, You can relate… It’s you I prefer! May be a mental state? My mind has been weak; My heart was previously manipulated. It’s just peace that I seek. With you, I am rejuvenated. Life seems to be infinitely intertwined. We’ve come full circle. Is there better to find? Mutual feelings areContinue reading “A Captured Soul”
Don’t Give Up
You mean something! You are so much, to so many. Oh, the smiles and fun you bring… Love? You have plenty! Where is your mind? We all love you. There has to be a different comfort to find… You’re giving misery a place to brew! Let us help! Stop running. You are losing yourself… WeContinue reading “Don’t Give Up”
I know how to make a mark, A part of me yearns for the past without mistakes. But I keep the depths of my soul in the dark. The other parts linger between the present and futures sake. May my love remain untamed. You are my my musketeer! It’s all the same… I often wonderContinue reading “Sometime…”
A Parallel Pair
In this wild world; let’s give it a whirl. It’s time to have faith! Come on and follow my pace. Your ways make my soul unfurl. In hindsight, we had a Pearl! It is with you I am safe, And that is a feeling I can’t seem to replace. May our Yin and Yang stillContinue reading “A Parallel Pair”
Today…Tomorrow… & Hopefully the Next…
Always in the background, Familiar presence covers me. The unknown is what we have found. It is love that set us free! In normalcy we would drown, Individualism…we agree. It is in the division that we frown. It is through God’s eyes that we see, May our future be sound. P.S. Be willing to receiveContinue reading “Today…Tomorrow… & Hopefully the Next…”
A part of me is sad, This place seems so empty and bare. My spirit should be glad, I am positive I left us behind, here, somewhere… There are paths that we travel alone. Growth stems from the pain, I couldn’t accept being something you control. Retro…the good time still remains. You helped me spreadContinue reading “Tides-“
The King & Queen – A Pair, but not a match.
We steady open and close doors looking for equality. The cards we are dealt do not align with the expected aftermath. A King & Queen seem to be a pair, but are yet the opposites of one another. They are not a perfect match. The both remain very different in their solitary ways. I ponderContinue reading “The King & Queen – A Pair, but not a match.”
Is this Nature, God, or Man?
What is happening? 🤔 Is Mother Nature striking back? Is Jesus coming? Are we being affected by 5G? Mother Nature: 🌎🌪🔥⛈🌊 Our planet is slowly, fading from the oil spills, concrete jungles, & pollution. The next shopping mart, factory, or chemical spill could be the last straw. However, if you are unable to leave aContinue reading “Is this Nature, God, or Man?”
✌🏼May I Come in Peace?✌🏼
Love sings the song of the heart! Our hugs feel like shelter… This has been hell from the start! It’s been a while since this girl has looked at the cards life has dealt her… The hopefulness lingers. She just want to feel safe! Her strength is victorious, even against what Karma brings her. MayContinue reading “✌🏼May I Come in Peace?✌🏼”
One Hand on Another
You’re tired; I’m worn-out… You’re grumpy; I’m cranky…You’re pushing me away; I’m staying to myself. At least we have something in common…
🎭Just me, I guess…🎭
I am a peacemaker, but my emotions are rather extreme. I think in an artistic way, but express myself in a passive way. In love, I seek excitement. I take on the role of the comedian. Sincerely, Honesty… 💌
People Panic…Do you?
I first would like to apologize if you disagree. Secondly, many are out there making rash decisions. When your out of your routine things can get a little ichy. So I ask you which one are you? And why? – The consumer – The rebel – The conspiracy theorist – The spiritual guide I’ll tellContinue reading “People Panic…Do you?”
The comfort that lingers is thick… I want to run at the first sign of it! Every time I almost break free… I can feel you inside of me. Just pull me closer… On second thought, let me off this roller coster. You are my Polaroid… An instant fix for this void.
It’s a shame; You behave… I should stop going to your place! You always lie.. Go get high. You said you’ve seen me with that guy… oh, oh, oh yeah.. Hang on don’t go – We both know.. We can stoop excessively, low. 0h…oh…oh…oh It’s a shame… I hate these games! Do you even rememberContinue reading “Real Release”
Just another Layer of the Sun…
Dear helping hand, Get it out of me…hurry! Even the lines are all getting blurry. I don’t know why it’s tearing apart my body. I’m confused at this path you pave me You feel like concrete darling, Am I being punished or saved? Yours Truly, Desperate Despair
The Lingering Catalyst
I can feel myself deteriorate; I fell so toxic. We made what we could make… I should have used logic! There’s a tiny lump inside me; I can feel the scabs flake away. The pain I can feel on my knees, Desperately, I pray. Just when you think the chapter gets better, The pages haveContinue reading “The Lingering Catalyst”
The silence is frightening; I am forced to deal. You have a grip on my breathing that seems to be tightening; I HATE to feel. The sadness I cannot bare, For I wrestle with fate. The only reflection is my empty, stare. My stomach turns at the thought of being late. Parts of me beginContinue reading “Deep Down”
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Coming back to life, OUCH!
I know you hate to lose, You’re probably wishing it was you; that I would choose. But I am tired of being your muse. Can’t you find someone else to use? I might cave. But once I get home, I won’t want to stay I feel at peace when I am away It is meContinue reading “Coming back to life, OUCH!”
I Can Feel You
It all began with a lump in the throat forged by abandonment; Quickly, followed by the uncertainty of the future. No choice was given except clinging tightly the the one thing left, even if it was not reciprocated. Whether the situation involved being taken or running away, the only feeling left was hollow resentment. TraumaContinue reading “I Can Feel You”
I choose you too!
You choose me when I’m insecure, Even when my speech is all blurred. Or when my judgement maybe curved. You choose me when I wouldn’t Although, you probably shouldn’t Thank for doing it when I couldn’t You choose me when I over think, Even when depression is on the brink, In all of my plansContinue reading “I choose you too!”
A Stillness Wonder…
You don’t reach out although smothered by hands. Admitting to the fear, Is that of moral stance. It is too toxic for you to remain near. I crumple our compassion and hand it over, Love in your heart has left. You can not win at life by simply using a clover, It hurt me toContinue reading “A Stillness Wonder…”
So is this whole being in the same place that you have before where you make different results? I don’t know if this is my meaning here or maybe my exit. I’m either here to always chose love and light no matter the situation or I’m a dumbass that’s simply insane. I am open forContinue reading “Conundrum #77,777”
I find myself in the same repetitive cycle. Once again, the feeling of familiarity arises during the battle of hearts. I’m choosing a different path than the many I have previously walked. I can feel wishful thinking wiggling it’s eager way to the forefront of the future. However, to walk this particular path, I mustContinue reading “Particular Ponderings”
Am I Found?
Just like that… I’m back, I’m in the purple of the flame; The all that’s not to blame. You might have felt as though, you gave me the fame… The safe part is behind that plaster you value; you still look lame. Ha, Ha! If only you could feel it, The righteousness of my kiss.Continue reading “Am I Found?”
Take my Advice
“People are rarely who they claim to be; but perhaps it is who they wish to become?”-KBJ
Let it be you!
Why does it feel so wrong to chose myself? I’ve been here too many times to count. A whirl wind romance on the fritz staggering between falling apart or becoming toxic. I’m not a victim. I know my faults, flaws, and wrong doings. I know I continue the vicious cycle, I cringe at the firstContinue reading “Let it be you!”
It’s a serene place, really. One that feels like home, but you don’t know it until you leave kind of place. It offers the comfort of hygee. It’s a place filled with such open space it feels free to be naked. It’s strange to feel free. Vulnerable;if you consider growing in a place just waitingContinue reading “Flip Side”
Oh, how I hate what you have taken, Leaving behind the lifeless. Strength is forsaken, For the pain caused seems to be silenced. I want you to stop, now! You have taken the one’s with bright smiles. My family and friends are mine, for you I will not endow. Faith and strength is neededContinue reading “(/)Drugs(/)”
Love me one day, just don’t make it today…
As a present day drifter: I am somewhat shattered and have taped myself back together by risky decisions and aspirations. The trickery of habitual roads has led me astray. My self discovery expedition has become pandemonium. My soul is full and drifting about in the energy of others, as a ship wreck full of diamonds,Continue reading “Love me one day, just don’t make it today…”
Well, hello, Mr. Unexpected… Who are you and who sent you to open this door that I have yet to acknowledge? It is the unforeseen circumstances that our energy has danced in unison. The perfect brokenness inside of one another fitting together like puzzles pieces. It is the nervous feeling within that suggests we mayContinue reading “Mr. Unannounced”
“It’s a Thrill to be a Fan Amongst Fans”-Nathan Fillion
It is of recent I decided to write from the Soul. No impressing, tweaking, or trying to market a specific kind of reader, just plain ol’ me. I am enthused with the amount readers, writers, bloggers, and critics that took time out of their busy lives and utter most passion to let me know thatContinue reading ““It’s a Thrill to be a Fan Amongst Fans”-Nathan Fillion”
Apollo was considered the God of sun, music, light, & Prophecy… I will learn how to enjoy you, I will figure out what your about, I used to long for the quiet, just a moment to check my mood. Though, I didn’t want to go this route… I always knew you could. SoContinue reading “Dear Silence,”
Tomorrow I will be Better.
Just when I think I knew what love was… I wonder how many times I will say that in life. I gave so much of myself to us. I don’t know who I am. I am fearful and in times of fear I seek comfort. You were my comfort. So, now I seek nothing. ThatContinue reading “Tomorrow I will be Better.”
Here you have it, Folks…The End.
Today I threw in the towel. I can no longer accept the disrespect. I hope that I am a mad person and I am making this decision over some kind of irrational emotion, but logically I cannot see it as that. If I explain my problems, triggers, and stresses in life and they are acknowledgeContinue reading “Here you have it, Folks…The End.”