-Worn & Wrinkly

I can feel myself ripping at the seams,

Begging to walk about noticeably, frayed.

The truth is devastating.

I do not want to see, but I long for illusion.

After all, the destination remains the same, but only one comes with a smile.

It maybe temporary bliss, but I remain faithful to hope.

-KBJ

Authentically, Rule the Occassion.

Solitude waits patiently lurking between the conscious and subconscious. The unfamiliar territory is home to a duplicate of me. She is wild, fearless, and leads with her heart. We share the same mirror, but our reflections are differing. I can no longer ignore the roar and she is on the prowl. It is from her perspective that I will thrive.

-KBJ

Dear Twin Flame,

I am not sure if you are found;

Or the one that is always around.

The truth will be revealed,

But it is by chance that the former will be sealed.

Surety has wandered.

Fate is not that of this earth;

It is in the love of all things true.

My soul is wide awake for you to view.

Just as the sun and moon share the morning sky,

Our peace can be found in the mind’s eye.

-KBJ

 

 

 

Love me one day, just don’t make it today…

As a present day drifter:  I am somewhat shattered and have taped myself back together by  risky decisions and  aspirations. The trickery of habitual roads has led me astray. My self discovery expedition has become pandemonium. My soul is full and drifting about in the energy of others, as a ship wreck full of diamonds, would slowly scatter about with every crash of ocean’s waves.

-KBJ

This is why, writer’s & musicians can’t be together…

“They both want to change the world. One with more force than the other…”

-KBJ

Dear Silence,

 

Apollo was considered the God of sun, music, light, & Prophecy…

I will learn how to enjoy you,

I will figure out what your about,

I used to long for the quiet, just a moment to check my mood.

Though, I didn’t want to go this route…

 

I always knew you could.

So I will learn to find my self in this empty space.

Hey, ya know… It’s all good.

It’s certainly time for me to save some face.

 

Let the tick of the clock keep me focused,

For I can then find myself in the hollow.

God, we will miss those really good moments,

But catch you on the slip side; or at the temple of Apollo.

Photo Credit:https://www.wikiart.org/en/giovanni-battista-tiepolo/apollo-and-diana-1757

 

-KBJ

Tomorrow I will be Better.

Just when I think I knew what love was… I wonder how many times I will say that in life. I gave so much of myself to us. I don’t know who I am. I am fearful and in times of fear I seek comfort. You were my comfort. So, now I seek nothing. That is as I feel inside. Nothingness. Life is routine and survival. I learned to love the chaos, the chatter, and annoyance. You tore my walls down and made me bear the truth about myself. Now I am left here standing naked for the world to judge. There was a time you loved me as much as I loved you – That is not something you can fake. If you mistakenly thought this was something you wanted and then later decided it is not, why can’t you leave with peace. Why must you make me suffer? You changed my world. You made me questions myself at who I was and who I wanted to be. But, you can have the decency to remove you’re the pieces of yourself from the home that remains silence. You show yourself to me looking like your falling a part inside. Stand there with your daughter, who I was just responsible for looking out for, once again asking for my help… But you can’t give me closure. Lucky for you, I don’t wish to change the world anymore. I wish to change myself and if you send your wishes then I know it is as hard for you that it is me.

“Pride is the mask of one’s own faults” -Proverb

God I miss ya’ll…

Is it Fate?

It brings a smile to my face to introduce you to this character. He is creative, charming, naturally handsome, determined, and passionate.  Not to sound cliché, but I can still remember the first moment our eyes met! It’s a rare moment in time. My guess is that time stood still because I can distinctly, to this day, smell the room, hear the song playing on the stereo, and experience the comfort of completeness I felt inside when his eyes met mine. It is unrivaled. Sounds like forever kind of story, huh? Well… would you believe me if I told you that we, “dated”, on and off for 10 years, sometimes it was me that drifted, others it was him. There was never a sad, hurtful, boring moment between us. It was fun, sexy, and enticing. However, life had a hold of us and would alert us when it was time to go out there in the real world and gain some more experience. Then suddenly, we would unexpectedly be in the same place at the same time. Even if it was at the entrance of a Kroger supermarket, we had this divine, universal connection. It was not until we were in our late twenties that we had a serious relationship. He was the prince charming to my fairytale and the best part was I was never disappointed or let down. We had what other’s yearn for; we EQUALLY made one another a better person. It was a slice of paradise.

All good things come to an end. What? Did you think it would be that easy? One moment turned it all around. It felt itchy and uncomfortable. We didn’t feel special anymore. Our worlds fell apart and the therapists lined their pockets. I was shattered, contemplating on how we could easily transition our children into living in separate homes. Days of denial passed before the universe grabbed us tight and placed us in the same place at the same time.

Who would have known a You Tube video about Aliens and the world’s creation would send us on a journey that can only be experienced and never explained. Disclaimer: This is not fiction and I not writing about bright, green life forms with big, black eyes. I am speaking of a journey about religion, God, mind, body & soul; astronomy, nature, and awareness. If you gather anything from reading this, get curious and do your own research. In other words that maybe easily understood, this journey was created by divine intervention. I would love to share the tale of discovery with you now, but you will have to read the book. 🙂 Here’s a little sneak peek:

Can you say that the universe (i.e. everything) confirms that your relationship is a divine union? The world shared secrets with us that no one could begin to think up! Listen to me! You will find love and partnership once you can be yourself, naked for the world to see… We are human and we lose faith from time to time, but our future is beyond our control. Luckily, we are blessed to be wrapped in the warmth of God’s love to catch us when we fall.